i’ve been experiencing stomach problems, which have been on again off again over some months now. these pains have lasted anywhere from 10 seconds to 5 minutes. by no means long, but damn, do they take you by surprise. well i was lucky enough to be on break from them for roughly 3-4 weeks when the pain came back. although this time, it was stronger than ever. it woke me up and curled me into a ball. normally it goes away when in fetal position but it just stayed. finally it subsided, somewhat, and i was able to fall asleep. the following night it hit me again and this time for longer. i was concerned and wanted to make time for the doctor, but never did, so i figured tonight i’ll go to ER. luckily the wait wasn’t to long. i was greeted by the doctor, who looked tired and annoyed, and asked me what the problem was. i explained to him what i was experiencing and compared it to my previous experiences with it. he listlessly said it was muscle spasms and to just take some muscle relaxants. okay i thought, but what i really thought was, this doesn’t feel like a muscle spasm. i got home, and contort myself in a position to sleep that alleviates the pain before i have to wake up to go to work. the pain hits me at breakfast, but i’m able to curb it by folding into myself. the pain is minor during work, just a cramping. tomorrow is wednesday and i’ve got time to go to the clinic to get my stitches removed and ask about my stomach. i drive to the clinic and wait to be served. when the doctor sees me he says i could be developing an ulcer or have a bacteria. i told him i’m going to see my family physician on friday and he said ask him about running some tests. well doesn’t friday come and i’ve been plagued with this damned pain all day and night. mind you, the night pain is worst than the day. anyways, i go see my doctor, who i wait longer to see than to consult with. he tells me that he sees no reason to do any tests. in conclusion, if i’m still feeling pain, he didn’t say for how long, nor did i ask, that i had his number and to book an appointment. well isn’t this just great? three professionals with three different conclusions, none of which has appeased my mind or body. i hope that it is nothing, like an ulcer, and that it’s a matter of a dietary change. but if not, i’m really disappointed in the lack of similarity of opinion. i value much of what i know and trust to science, and yet in this instance i’ve experienced glaring flaws with each doctors diagnosis. i guess, if it is something serious, only stool will tell.
No, this isn’t personalized, but regard the following sentiments as heartfelt, although never publicly affirmed. Surprise at your passing like or indifferent follow, I shy away from such actions as my virtual peers. This shyness is a euphemism for fear, one based in deadlock reason. Logic permits my fears, regardless how irrational. Take it as, “being irrationally logical.” So for all people to don me attention, I’m appreciative your your action and apologize to you for not returning continuation. I think myself fear, and there it is. The foundation has remained, supporting an adapting aesthetic geared in perpetuation of something misunderstood. We all see dots, it’s in how we connect them that constellations are made. Thanks again for your time. There’s only so much validation one can receive from conceptually stagnate family. It takes an idiot to call an idiot. I call idiot on myself.