I’m pleased, why?

look at that dog chasing its tail.
there’s no need to involve another.
content to follow itself,
it leads its own pleasure.
such focus belongs to nature.
a nature speaking will
of direction and definition.
traveling refinement
sharpens conclusions.

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I know i’m wrong

i think you are this,
i think you are that.
i know this,
i know that,
but what i really know
is not what that is.
misconception bores
preconception.
you think this,
to which i think that.
what is tends disinformation.

Personally speaking objectively

insulated ignorance
blanketing misconceptions,
making what is
into what might be.
possibility unknown of certainty,
could be this,
that that is not.
an ideal personally subjected
to personal objectivity.
wait, that doesn’t make sense.
impartial review cannot
count upon experience.
facts dictate facts that
individuation particularizes.
the minority speaks to
unheard majority volumes.
is life lived less
than life objectified?

I try art because art lives

“art saves him, and through art – life.”

this was a line that i took, probably out of context, from friedrich nietzche. you must pardon me, for i’m trying to read what i don’t know, which to be honest, is everything. disregarding his initial intention, i’ve taken these words to mean something else to me.

this snippet in particular resonates with why i create, let alone think. i’ve always used some form of art to express myself. it’s a cyclical existence you see: i live to create and i create what i live. i’ve tried to realize my shortcomings as a so called “artist” – the lack of technical proficiency and misconception – although, i use these weaknesses as a strength. how can a weakness be a strength? simple. to know one’s limit is to know one’s progress.

i will admit mediocrity, even when i strive for originality. Knowing this, i still create what i can with what i’ve got because this cathartic impulse can only be satiated by myself.

regardless of its uselessness to others, i create because i live and i live for that ideal that is but a shadow of reality i experience.

Dying as i have lived

do you know what you’re doing? i wish i could say yes, but no, no i do not. wait, what am i talking about? of course i know what i’m doing: i’m living. surely we all have a different opinion on what qualifies as living, but for me, as long as you’re breathing, you’re living. i know many would argue against this fact, but technically, to me at least, it seems like a self evident truth. now, what you do while you’re breathing, that’s a whole other story. maybe that’s what people mean by the statement, “get a life.” if it was like Mario world, heck, i would collect the hell out of those green 1 up mushrooms, but since this is not video game land, i’ll just live within myself. it’s hard to understand others when one cannot understand oneself. i seem to like things and not like things and so do other, yet i can’t find someone of which makes me feel wholly similar or comfortable. i might divulge personality to another, but that is in hopes to find reciprocation. alas, i’m left alone and wanting. for what, i cannot comprehend, nor does another. alone i was born, and alone i shall die. half knowing myself and those of whom i consorted with.

I don’t know

allow me to
point
you in this direction.
don’t follow my lead
though,
this is just what i’ve been told.
i presume scraps of truth
in what’s been said.
reason rests upon
fanciful belief.
belief and fact,
skewed,
impede judgment,
to which each slant levels.
distorted facts contort belief
towards irrationality.
i don’t know what i know.

Strategy of the undecided.

i’m a poor strategist,
all or nothing.
but that’s hard when
sitting upon the fence.
i see both sides of the green.
i can’t decide which
side to choose when
both sides look green.
i’m all in for indecision.
to decide is to commit,
and i’m not certain with choice.
given more time for choose,
i’ll remain undecided.
i cannot chose one for the other
without really knowing.
but once known,
i’ve lost.
i cannot pick one for the other,
both are correct, being it
win or lose.