Thinking crowds a space.

it’s feeling a bit stuffy in here.
yes, it’s crowded,
but i don’t think that’s why.
it’s been hot all day,
so it can’t be the temperature.
being that it’s hot,
i’m wearing the least amount
of clothing acceptable on a man.
the beverages are ice cold,
albeit not frozen.
so what the hell is it
that is making me
suffocate this heat?
i’ve got an idea.
one. two. three…
whoa, that feels better.
wait, where did i put my wallet?

Hand jobs working thoughts.

It’s taken some time to realize but my hands give me more pleasure than computers. Dirty as if may be misconstrued, I mean in the ways of creation. There is something to be said with making something with ones own hands. Be the creation an illustration or something written, I’ve found more satisfaction in using pencil to paper than the computer. I feel more connection being physically involved with my creation as opposed to using the intermediary computer. Sure, I can make the same stuff, but the satisfaction has evaporated, leaving me dissatisfied. I could post much of my thoughts and ideas if I didn’t write them down first. Much of what I think, I’ll write down. After that I leave it, never again to transfer it into the virtual world. Sadly, much of my written work, nothing comparable to those whose time is consumed but such habits, is translated into the virtual world. When feeling climaxes, I reach for pencil and paper. The connection to what’s being expressed never feels as authentic in the virtual space as it does when firstly transcribed in the physical. Now is the exception because the thought(s) being typed/expressed are being experienced while upon the computer. Had I not been present with my trusty box I’d have either written it down, or just thought it. Giving physicality to my thoughts brings me closure and allows for future rumination. Thinking the same thoughts, this is my opportunity for refinement, although there is no one to retort such trivialities, it gives me a sense of inclusion. This is an infinite space compared to a notebook that is public to many eyes. There is a sad hope that these “other” eyes will assist in the betterment of my thought, outward actions as well as my general contentment. “You and one companion are audience enough for each other; so are you for yourself. For you, let the crowd be one, and one be a crowd. It is a vile ambition in one’s retreat to want to extract glory from one’s idleness.” – Michel De Montaigne. This quote further enforces my thoughts, but it’s hard for me to believe. Much of my thoughts are thought but not some much as believed. I guess you could say I don’t trust my gut. It’s hard to entrust reason to ones stomach. I hunger constantly and my thoughts are more easily satisfied than my gut. How can I trust something that constantly craves filling? There is reason for filling, but is it ever enough to last? Hunger can be satiated but it’d never completely full. That’s probably why I create, or at least reinvigorate. I use reinvigorate because much of what I think has be already thought and continues being discussed. Now to end this… Keep your ideas because they are as right and wrong as what I think. We make up right and wrong, so whatever I’ve said will entertain your conceptions of right and wrong. In the end, discussion hopefully will promote inclusion.